Vermilion

[NYC300Z]

Her slightest wish better be his command! He owes to Lana for waiting this long and for being such an idiot! I wonder what they do once they assure everybody that everything is ok? Will they go back to the fortress or to the loft where it's warmer? Will Lana insist on reliving those memories herself?

PPMS!

[Clana227]

oh can't wait for more. PPMS

[binkys711]

Lana is taking it pretty well but she's still scratching the surface...hehe I liked that they both eased into an emotional hug.

PPMS!! Hope Lana makes a really GOOD wish

[kewl]

genie clark! pls continue card

[Trent083]

Up she goes, PPMS

[kewl]

need an update over here card!

[CaptainObvious]

Lex is going to flip! I hope Lana keeps her current train of thought when they get back to SV.

Another post would be nice!

[Nemu]

ok... the last chapter is missing Card...

did you abandon this fic here?

Hmmm... To add on to my comment elsewhere...

Will there be a big reveal about the baby too? I sure hope so... that would put the last of her bad feelings with the situation (being connected to Baldy that is) to rest...

Anyway...

PPMS!!!!

[treker]

Originally posted by Nemu
ok... the last chapter is missing Card...

did you abandon this fic here?

Hmmm... To add on to my comment elsewhere...

Will there be a big reveal about the baby too? I sure hope so... that would put the last of her bad feelings with the situation (being connected to Baldy that is) to rest...

Anyway...

PPMS!!!!

It's only been 10 days nemu....Card never diappoints so let's cut him some slack.

P.S. speaking of abandoned fics.....

[Nemu]

oh Brian... 10 days is nothing I know...

the fact that I could tell you exactly what is coming in the next update is what im talking about...

Card did write the next one... but it isnt posted here... maybe he didnt have time for it yet...

as for abandonned fics...

Ideas are roaming around... been sick most of the last 2 weeks... mainly exhaustion...

[Cardinal]

Confession of the Heart


Clark brought Lana back to the caves and then picked her up and headed for the sheriff’s office. He couldn’t speed her right to the sheriff’s front door without a security camera spotting them suddenly appear out of nowhere, and if they just walked there once in town, they would risk being spotted by Lex’s men, so Clark had to compromise. So, he zipped into town with Lana in his arms, stopping in some deep shadows not too far from the sheriff’s office.

Clark set Lana down and took a few steps away from her as he checked their immediate vicinity for any of Lex‘s goons. “Stay here, Lana. Let me scout ahead to see if Lex stationed anyone around the sheriff’s office. The last thing we want is to have them see us right now.”

“Okay, Clark, I’ll stay here and wait. I trust you.”

The simple faith expressed in that statement made Clark do a double take. In an absolute deadpan manner, he said, “You trust me. Me, the guy that’s lied to you about himself for years.”

“Yes, you,” Lana said as she stepped in close. “The man who sacrificed his own happiness for me. The man who was willing to have me think the worst about him if only I’d stay alive. The man who has trusted me with his very life by telling me his deepest secrets…yeah, I think I can trust you.”

She trusts me, Clark thought. The very idea seemed ridiculous after everything that had happened between them since his death, but the reality of it warmed his heart like nothing else could. Maybe we have a shot after all.

Clark spent the next minute zipping all over the area surrounding the sheriff’s office, making sure the coast was clear before allowing Lana to walk the last one-hundred yards to the sheriff’s front door. Clark’s fears of a Luthor security presence went unrealized and he sent Lana into the office.

“Hi,” Lana said brightly to the deputy behind the desk. “I’m Lana Lang, and I just heard you folks may be looking for me.”

Besides the deputy watching the jail cells, Sergeant Tom Brooks was the only Sheriff’s deputy left in the station. Everyone else was out searching for the stunning young woman that had just walked in the front door. The sergeant slid his rolling office chair over to the dispatch station and signaled to the sheriff that Miss Lang had just walked in the front door unharmed.

The sheriff was just about to convert the search for Lana into a manhunt for Clark when Lana piped up and said, “Umm…I wasn’t kidnapped. I’ll admit that I left the dining room at Luthor Mansion unwillingly, but Clark convinced me to come with him, so there’s nothing to worry about there.”

When that information was relayed to the sheriff, the search was ended once the deputy was able to convince the sheriff that he was indeed looking at, and talking to, Lana Lang.

Lex had somehow gotten a radio on the sheriff’s department’s private frequency and he burst in at that moment, screaming that Lana was to be taken into custody until he could make it to the sheriff’s office.

The sheriff’s eyes rolled before saying, “Mr. Luthor, it appears that you have wasted enough of my resources this evening already. Miss Lang is alive and unharmed as you will be able to ascertain by watching the footage from our security cameras when you make it to the station. What you will not be able to do is have us arrest a woman that has done nothing wrong…and if you persist in using this frequency which is limited to official use only, I’ll have you arrested. Got it?”

Frustrated beyond endurance, Lex screamed, “You can’t do this to me, I’m Lex Luthor.”

“Get over yourself, Boy, it’s already been done.”

Lana hadn’t waited for the end of that exchange, as soon as she heard that Lex and/or his people were on their way to get her, she scurried out the door and back to where Clark was waiting for her.

“All done?” he asked.

“Yeah, the sheriff called off the search. It should be safe for you when we come back.”

Clark beamed at Lana. “Thanks. Now, before we go back, you need to be fed, so I’m taking you out for some Chinese.”

In minutes, Clark had them at an out-of-the-way Metropolis restaurant that Chloe swore up and down had the best Chinese food this side of Shanghai. Lana had just come back to their booth after straightening her appearance in the bathroom, when Chloe hustled in to join them. Lana raised her eyebrows at Clark quickly before warmly greeting Chloe.

After everyone had exchanged greetings and had ordered their meals, Clark said, “I asked Chloe to join us here so she could tell you a few more things about Lex, things you don’t know yet but should, while we eat.”

“I’m so glad to see Clark’s decided to tell you everything…again,” Chloe said. “Let’s see if we can make it stick this time.”

“We’d better,” Clark replied grimly, “I’ve run out of do-overs. Besides, I’ve proven I don’t handle those very well.”

First, Chloe explained how it came to be that she knew Clark’s secrets. When she made it clear that Lana was the only person Clark had voluntarily told his secrets to, and he had done it twice, Lana smiled. It made her feel special to know others had learned his secrets through happenstance, but she had been singled out for his special trust.

Between bites, Chloe spent the next forty-five minutes explaining various schemes that Lex was involved in over the years, things they hadn’t been able to tell Lana about without making her wonder about Clark’s secrets. By the time Clark paid the check and they were about to leave, Lana was angry. Her anger wasn’t a volcanic, over-the-top anger like you’d expect from Lex. Her anger was cold and focused. Her only problem was, she couldn’t decide who she was more angry with, Lex for being such a two-faced liar, or herself for falling for the lies.

As she and Clark waved goodbye to Chloe, who had to get back to the Planet, Lana thought, Still, we have a baby together. We will always have that connection, no matter how much I might wish otherwise. Oh why can’t this baby be Clark’s?

“Ready?” Clark asked.

Lana’s answer was to jump into the air, showing her complete trust in Clark as she forced him to catch her before they sped off. Once again back at the Fortress, Clark was suddenly at a loss about what to do next. He had intended to tell Lana all about losing his powers, his death, his subsequent resurrection, and the terrible price someone would have to pay on his behalf. He knew he would tell her all of that eventually, but it suddenly didn’t seem so important for her to know all of that right now.

He now had a powerful need to tell her something else she might want to know, something she might want to hear from Clark Kent instead of Kal-El. In the last few hours, Clark had poured out a good part of his story to Lana…now it was time for him to pour out his heart. He paced back and forth as he tried to collect his thoughts.

To Lana’s eyes Clark was more agitated than he’d been at any time since his Clark persona had regained control. She reached a hand out and rested it on Clark’s forearm. Like magic, her touch seemed to draw off his excess nervous energy, allowing his feet to come to a stop, and his mouth to start. Clark turned to face Lana. Her hazel eyes searched his jade green ones as she tried to puzzle out what he wanted to say next.

“I am so sorry, Lana, for many things, but foremost on that list of regrets is the fact that I lied to you last year when I said I didn’t love you anymore. I know how much you hate lies, and that’s the biggest one I’ve ever told.”

“Why’d you lie, Clark?” Lana asked, “I was devastated when you said that.” Just thinking about that night brought Lana to the verge of tears.

“After I had decided to keep my secrets from you when I changed time to save your life, I expected you to break it off with me. I figured once you did that, you’d finally be able to move on with your life, and find a guy who could make you happy. I could’ve found it within me to be happy for you if you had chosen any man other than Lex.

“My problem was that you held onto me, and onto us, with great determination. Though you were more and more upset with me, you still believed in us even though I kept hurting you. You can’t know what that kind of constancy meant to me.

“Anyway, when that deal with that hypnotist girl Simone happened, I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t stand the fact that I always seemed to find new ways to hurt you…so I decided, if you wouldn’t break up with me, I’d have to break up with you.” Clark didn’t want to admit what was coming next. “I…I wanted you to hate me so you could finally move on with your life.”

“You can't make me stop loving you, Clark. Only I can do that...and I haven't done that yet,” Lana said softly. Then, adding considerable heat to her voice, she added, “What you did was just...just...STUPID. It was the crown jewel of your ways to hurt me.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Clark said. “There’s no defense for what I did. Sorry seems such an inadequate word for what I feel right now, but it’s all I’ve got. I feel like such a heel for what I did to you that night. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done and it was done with the best of intentions, but it was still wrong.” Clark knelt in front of Lana on the hard surface of the Fortress. “So I’m here now to beg for your mercy and forgiveness. I deserve neither, but only you can heal the wound in my heart.”

How ironic that Clark would use those words, Lana thought, since he’s the only one that can heal my heart. His heartfelt apology is a good start, but I need to hear more. Still, now that’s he’s taken the first step, the next one is mine.

“You’re right, Clark,” Lana said quietly. “You don’t deserve my mercy and forgiveness.” Then, through her unshed tears, came a tremulous smile. “But you have them anyway. I forgive you.”

Clark rocked back on his heels as a look of bliss overtook his face. To know he hadn’t irrevocably ruined everything lifted a massive weight off of his shoulders, a weight of which he hadn’t even been aware.

Lana watched silently, pleased that she had been the cause of such happiness for Clark. But still, one thought lingered in her mind: Who’s going to lift my spirits? I need it just as much as he does, and I admit that right now I can’t do it myself.

Clark made it to his feet, reached out, and took Lana’s hands tentatively in his. When she didn’t resist him, he used his thumbs to lightly rub the backs of her hands.

“What you don’t know, Lana, is what I’ve done since you’ve been gone. I’ve spent countless hours alone in the loft, bouncing a rubber ball as I thought about what I had driven away. In a futile attempt at staying close to you, I did just about anything I could that reminded me of you. I read Russian classics by Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, Nabokov, and others.”

Curious now, Lana asked, “Which book did you like the best?”

“Mmm…I liked Tolstoy’s War and Peace, his Anna Karenina, and Dostoevsky’s The Brothers Karamazov the best.”

“Good choices…what else did you do?”

“I watched horse shows on TV, and once, I even went to see a ballet in Metropolis.”

Shocked, Lana asked, “You went to see a ballet? No way.”

“Yes way. I went to see the Metropolis Ballet Company’s production of The Nutcracker last December.”

“Did you like it?”

Clark hesitated before telling the truth. “No, I hated it. I ended up leaving halfway through.”

“That sounds more like my Clark.”

Lana was smiling to know that Clark had been so in love with her that he had thrown himself into her type of activities. Clark was smiling because Lana had called him ‘my Clark.’

“And then, when my spirits reached their depths, I went back to try something I already knew I didn’t like, just to be a bit closer to you.”

“And that was…?”

“Poetry. I read poets by the hundreds. Poetry about love, about loneliness, about suffering, I read every poet I could get my hands on. Anything that might give me an insight into you.”

“Did you like any of it?”

“Mmm…I can say I developed an appreciation for it, though I didn’t truly like too much of it.” Then, putting his memory to good use, Clark said, “I did like this one though:


William Shakespeare - Sonnet #18

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.”


Lana was stunned to hear Clark quoting any poetry, much less one of Shakespeare‘s love sonnets.

“That made me think of you, Lana,” Clark said. “I could see every detail of your face as I read those lines. It was as though it was written for me to speak to you.” Clark paused before continuing. “Being without you has been like missing the better half of me. I’ve missed our friendship, that close-knit bond we had back before I died. We may not be able to get back to exactly where we were since we’re two different people now, but I want that kind of connection again…and I want it with you.” Clark made sure his eyes were locked with Lana’s. “I love you, Lana Lang. I always have and I always will.”

"I love you too, Clark. Never doubt that."

[SVsleuth]

I'm so glad Clark finally apologized for lying to Lana in Hypnotic. He's blessed that she could forgive him for that blunder. But she truly loves him and "Love forgives all wrongs".

So glad they've both confessed their love for one another now. And I'm sure Clark will fill her in on the rest of the secrets very soon.

Wonderful chapter. PPMS!

[clana1fan4ever]

Great update!!!

So Glad that Clark and Lana finllay confessed they love each other

PPMS!!

[Nemu]

lol so there it is!

I will only point to my previous post...

not to repeat myself.... (about the baby)

[NYC300Z]

Bonjour
Finally an upate here
im in paris france but was still glad when i saw this

ppms