Did Clark really betray Lex?

[laurarawlins]

Do you think Clark betrayed Lex by lying to him? or do you think Lex betrayed Clark more by space invading Clark? and disrespecting his privacy? any thoughts or opinions? I am really trying to get a deeper understanding about Clark's and Lex's relationship because I don't really understand it yet.

[Aurora Moon]

You forgot Lionel Luthor on the poll. If Jonathan was influencing how much the relationship went south, Then so did Lionel Luthor.

Remember that in early seasons Lionel displayed all the classical symptoms of an Narcissistic abuser: http://www.narcissisticabuse.com/cha...he-narcissist/

Likewise, Lex Luthor displays all the classic cases of being the victim of a narcissist father:
1) Constantly questioning everything, because he has the inability to tell if people are telling him the truth or not. This is thanks to the Narcissist gaslighting him a lot.

2) Always feeling alone, even around other people. Victims of Narcissists often feel like they're an outsider to groups and communities, like they'll never be accepted. Sometimes this can lead to resentment and lashing out at close friends. in the TV show, you can see Lex pretty much distancing himself from people even though he wanted to be part of the community.

3) Nothing he does is ever good enough for his father, no matter how successful he is. So he has an perfectionist complex.

4) He felt engulfed by the relationship with his father.... his father is everywhere in his life, and his father pretty much controls his life from behind the scenes as he struggles to break free of his father.

5) He compromised his personal integrity and values. In the past, he stood up for what he believed in. But he needed his father's approval, so he started doing things that he thought his father would approve of. Keep in mind this starts even before Lionel became a brainwashed goody-two shoes.

6) He is exhausted by the repeated cycles of Hurt and Rescue.

Hurt-and-rescue cycles explain why narcissistic abuse victims experience cravings and obsessive thoughts once No Contact has been executed. According to an experiment inspired by Langer, Blank, and Chanowitz (1978), and recently conducted by Dolinski and Nawrat**, when the event that provokes and justifies one’s experience of fear is suddenly removed (i.e., No Contact with the Narcissist), we may experience a short-lasting state of disorientation. The action produced by fear is no longer functional in the new circumstances (your removal of the silent treatment due to implementing No Contact), and a new program has not yet been instigated. Their assumption is that during this period of disorientation, people function automatically and mindlessly, engaging in automatic, pre-programmed actions.
In other words, even when we’ve gone No Contact, we tend to engage in the same obsessive thoughts and behaviors as when we were still with the Narcissist and endured the Silent Treatment because our subconscious minds cannot tell the difference.

[laurarawlins]

more questions

Can you explain Clark's and Lex's roles in how they created that rift in their relationship? how is both Clark and Lex both at fault for what happened between them? and How did both Jonathan Kent and Lionel Luthor influence that rift between Lex and Clark? and did Lana Lang have any influence in that rift between Lex and Clark as well? because they both desired her and were always competing on who ends up getting her? Did Lana somehow become the reason why Clark and Lex turned into enemies? or was there more to that than just falling in love with the same girl who doesn't let any one have their secrets? and disrespects boundaries? and besides Jonathan and Lionel, who else had an influence or impact on Clark's and Lex's relationship? and how did Lana Lang get involved in Clark's and Lex's relationship? and whatever problems Clark and Lex have in their relationship, did Lana, Jonathan and Lionel have anything to do with them? or were they just part of the problems they already had in their relationship to begin with? I mean how does that work exactly? how does that resonate their reasoning and logic behind their justification of their attitude and behavior in socially dealing with them in terms of interacting with them honestly and truthfully?

[Aurora Moon]

Clark was too insecure at times and immature as an teenager. He hadn't grown into a confident self-assured man yet, so he had the tendency to listen to others and what they were saying instead of making his own decisions about certain stuff. Yes, there was times when he rebelled against his father by staying friends with Lex, etc..... but then he would second-guess Lex and his motives every time Lana or one of his other friends made a comment about the bald billionaire.

Lex Luthor wanted Clark to be something that Clark wasn't ready to be at the time, etc. Basically, Had Clark been much more older and confident, then Clark would had been exactly the friend that Lex wanted him to be. Especially if he was already superman who constantly recused him from his stalkers, from his father, etc on a regular basis. In short, Lex wanted an hero who would always be there for him... be his moral compass, etc.
The only problem? sometimes that's too much to ask of anybody, even for Superman. Lex was kind of needy in that way, but I'm sure he would deny that. After all, Luthors don't need anybody... or so his father tells him.

That's the thing... both Clark and Lex had fatherly issues in their own ways, and that also affected their relationship somewhat.

[moviefan2k4]

The way the characters were written for the series, both were at fault for the rift in different ways. Lex originally just wanted the truth, for no other reason than to know Clark trusted him. But because of his own history with Lionel, Jonathan kept telling Clark neither of the Luthors could be trusted. As a result, Clark distanced himself from Lex to respect his adopted father's wishes. This only increased Lex's determination, and Lionel kept filling his head with stories about "great men seeking power, no matter the cost". In addition to all of that, there was also the mostly-silent feud between Clark and Lex, over Lana's affections. Lex was desperate for someone to really love him, like his mother had...and I suppose he saw something in Lana which reminded him of Lillian. Clark loved Lana, but also feared telling her the truth because her parents died in the meteor shower. Ever being a seeker of truth, Lana grew to despise secrets from anybody...and Lex used that trait to position her against Clark for his own gain. What he never expected was Lana discovering his own secrets, which turned her against him as well. The constant rejection and manipulation finally pushed him over the edge, to the point he killed his own father in search of a power he had no right to control.